I'm sitting here listening to music on Spotify and I decide to look up, 'Barry Manilow'. Now, before I go any farther, yes I admit it. I like Barry Manilow. Sometimes I just ooze mush and really want to hear Weekend In New England. Sue me.
Anyhoo... I came across the title of a song that I recognized from, and hadn't heard since- my childhood. Sixth grade to be exact. The song: Don't Sit Under The Apple Tree (with anyone else but me)My best friend and I had attended a school dance. We had our eye on this bushy blonde haired kid in torn jeans and a leather jacket. We decided that we both liked this rebel rouser and that it would be perfectly ok with us if we dated him together, so we asked him out and we let him know we were a package deal. I can't recall who did the actual asking, but it's the only time in my life that I made that kind of 'first move' on a boy. (I'm pretty sure she did it).
He agreed to date us both. (as if any red blooded 6th grade boy would say 'no'?) We took turns dancing with him and by the end of the night she decided she was done with that: I could have him.
From there it seemed to really blossom for Eric and I. The next school day he met me out front of the school and handed me a glossy gift box with delicate pink flowers printed all over it. The box contained a pure white lace doily. And inside the doily - wait for it.... a pet rock. I don't know if it was supposed to be a pet rock, but it was a rock. I suppose it could have been somewhat in the shape of heart. Sort of.
Maybe.
On the inset of the lid, there was what was supposed to resemble sheet music. The song lyrics on it were of 'Don't Sit Under The Apple Tree'.
I remember explicitly thinking, 'Mmkaaay'. It was totally weird to me. Touching and sweet as anything. But you have to understand the juxtaposition of such contrasting ideas. Here I was- head over heels with this kid and his rock and roll bad boy image reminiscent of Billy Idol crossed with Rod Stewart and he brings me a lace doily and a rock all wrapped up in a drug store gift box emblazoned with an old timey love song. It was down right disappointing and endearing all at the same time.
We spent all our spare time together for the next couple weeks riding our bmx bikes to and from each others' house and hanging out with his friends- with him trying to make a move on me each day. His problem though, was that I'd never kissed anyone before. In fact, shortly before that dance, I had just been dumped by only the second boyfriend I had ever had BECAUSE I wouldn't make out with him.
Now, ladies... tell me if you can relate: When a guy wants to kiss you, and if you are shy at all- what should he do? ASK you to kiss him? ASK you if it's ok if he kisses you? And if he is lucky enough that you say yes, should he close his eyes, pucker up and wait for it?
I think not. Ya gotta take my kisses or you weren't getting them.
I remember one day Eric and I were playing on the playground in a wooden playhouse. He blocked the doorway and told me he wasn't letting me out until I kissed him. ME... kiss HIM. And I see that he really wasn't going to let me out. Combined with the feeling of HAVING to in order to be let out, and feeling like I'd put him off too many times already anyway, I told him I would. But I had conditions. (There were always conditions) He had to sit down, and close his eyes. He did so and sat there waiting. I do think I really intended to try. But I couldn't do it. So while he was off guard, sitting there with his eyes unaware, I got up and ran. Neener Neener can't catch me! (Phew! That was close)
Case in point: We hung out a lot with his best friend Josh who had a sister close to my age, and lived only a block away. Often times Eric would leave me at Josh's house when he had to hurry home, and then it would be dark out and Josh would walk me to my place.
You see where this is going don't you?
One night in particular Josh and I were having a great conversation on the way to my house and when we got there we weren't ready to end it. So we leaned against the house by the side yard and talked and talked and talked. Next thing I knew, not only was he facing me, but leaning into me and his tongue was leaning into my mouth! I'd never even kissed on the lips before, let alone this!
He didn't ask. At least not until after about 5 minutes of this wonderful thing did he stop to look at me and ask if I was mad at him for it. I answered with another half hour of the same and hoped it let him know I certainly wasn't. It was the sweetest experience compared to all the repetitive, cold demanding expectations of, 'Are you going to kiss me today?" queries.
Maybe it was the offers to walk me home, and Josh's tender gentlemanly ways in every other sense, that made it perfectly ok for him to not ask. I trusted him. I knew he was kind.
Eric wasn't happy, but it seemed only right that we tell him and let him know I was going to be Josh's girlfriend now, lol. But as always, expectations ruined everything.
As I mentioned, Josh's sister and I had become friends. I liked spending time with her as well as Josh. To me it was a 2in1 deal, but they wouldn't share. How does a 10 year old girl juggle the logistics of when to be a friend and when to be a girlfriend? Josh became resentful of the time and attention I was giving his little sister and thus him and I fizzled out. Eventually her and I did as well because we always seemed to get into little tiffs.
Overall it's a sweet and sour memory to me. I don't recall being very broken up about it all. But I remember being aware of the distance that came between him and his once best friend Eric.
Thank you Eric: with out you I probably never would have gotten over my crush on Rod Stewart.
And thank you Josh: If not for your slick moves, I might still be dodging kisses.
